I am 26 years old. I simply got into s*x out
of ignorance like millions of young people today. My addiction placed me as the
highest abortionist in the world at age of 26 and now, I have a sad story to
tell. Until I found myself in a total mess, I never really had any Idea what
premarital s*x was all about. I never knew it was so useless and killing.
Before I got into it, I use to think it was some fun and I dreamt of it more
often than not.
I wished with all my heart to have a boyfriend
whom we would explore it together, little did I know that I was being nasty to
myself. Because of things I see on TV and magazine, I thought having s*x was so
much fun, I fantasized about it each time I felt lonely.
I was just a little
girl but I had big wishes and huge fantasies. Only if I had known that
everything I see in movies and soap operas were just acting and make belief;
only if I had known that there is nothing in s*x after all, the only thing in
it is self destruction; I think my life wouldn’t be this miserable.
It’s a pity i really had to learn the
hard way and I really wish I had never been born, I wish I had not come out
into this deceitful world where nobody cares about young people, all the so
called adults do is how they would play on the intelligence of young people in
a bid to exploit and use them to satisfy their insatiable s*xual passion. I
really feel bad about this wicked world. My plight started when I was sixteen,
then I was still a virgin and in secondary school, I was ignorant of many
things but because I see it every day on the TV and internet.
More so, a couple of so called Anti AIDS
people visited us in school a couple of times for lectures, but all they did
was introduce s*x to us even more because they really had nothing but condoms
to show. Fine, they told us about AIDS, but at the same time, they also told us
about condoms, they never really said anything real about s*x, they said we
could contact AIDS not through s*x, but unprotected sex, which means there was
nothing wrong with s*x as long as you could use condoms, but all of that I now
know very well are lies, and I wonder why men and women would enjoy telling
teenagers deadly lies like that.
Even though I can’t blame those people totally
for my plight because they weren’t really the ones that said I should go into
s*x, I still never forgive them for encouraging me and other young people like
me into s*x with their preaching of protected sex or condom. Even though I
wanted to see what s*x was really like and I fantasized about it, some were
within me, I was still very scared of what may happen to me afterwards if l
tried it, and it was that fear that actually kept me away from it until I was
sixteen.
By the time I was sixteen, my fantasy
had gotten enough boost to express itself with reliance to said to myself one
day, “free yourself baby girl, there is nothing terrible in sex, can’t you see
everyone is doing it, by the way, you can always use condoms nothing will
happen”. So, I finally decided to let go of my fears and embrace in totality my
silly fantasies, and that was how I took the very first step into this
miserable life of illicit s*x. I had absolutely no idea of what I was going
into.
I finally agreed to date this guy who
had been disturbing me for more than a year, his name was Andrew. Andrew was
five years older than me. Both of us began enjoying s*x, we did it every
seconds, every minute; I became addicted that I do not love doing it with
condom anymore. Within the period, I had 14 abortions for Andrew, and not only
that, I cheated on him in several occasions, I felt doing it with other guys will
give me better sensation but all were the same.
My school teacher got me and at the end
of the day I had 6 abortions for him. And worst among was my s3xual affairs
with my close relations, which resulted to 5 ab0rtions. Then I felt I was at
the top of the world. I will never forgive my friends who introduced me into
partying and sleeping with old men with potbelly and rough skin only in the
name of s*x. Right now, all those men have gone, and then shadow of my past
s3xual life still follows me around. All this pills and tablets I took are now
telling on my blood stream.
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