I KEEP
having sex with the guys I serve at the transport cafe where I work but I
always feel cheap and used afterwards.
I’m a single
woman of 28. I’ve worked serving burgers in a transport cafe for the past three
years. Most of our customers are lorry drivers. Some of them flirt with me and
ask about “extras”. I give them my phone number and meet up with them after
work.
The sex is
mostly very passionate but in the morning I wake up in a stranger’s lorry, or
with some guy in my bed and no idea of who they really are.
There was one
guy last week I really liked. We had the most amazing sex. As soon as we got
through the door we were ripping each other’s clothes off and kissing wildly.
He was gentle but it was really passionate.
Afterwards we
got dressed almost without a word. As he turned towards the door he said he’d
see me around. I knew he wasn’t serious about seeing me again. It’s what all
the guys say and sadly he was no different.
But I just
can’t seem to stop myself sleeping with guys I’ve just met. Sometimes it feels
like I’m trying to prove a point but I always end up feeling cheap and used. I
want to stop this.
I’d love to
find a guy to settle down and have a family with but I can’t say no to sex,
even though sometimes I’d prefer just a kiss and a cuddle. It’s always the
same. I don’t understand what I’m doing wrong.
Why can’t I
keep a guy for more than one night?
DEIDRE SAYS:
Men who want one-night stands and are just passing through aren’t usually up for a meaningful relationship, so even if you meet someone you really like, they’re unlikely to want to see you again.
And they tend
to assume you’re operating by the same standards they do. If you have sex the
first night you meet, they think that’s what you want – sex.
You’re giving
out signals that suggest you don’t mind how badly you’re treated, so make a
firm decision that you won’t have sex so quickly in future. Instead, build
friendships which will lead to real relationships.
I’m sending
you my leaflet Too Much Casual Sex to help you to think this through. You
deserve so much better but may need help to rate yourself more highly, so my
leaflet on Raising Self-Esteem is on its way too.
Source: Thesun
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